Sideways For The Price of A Smartphone

HeLLga, my E36 325i Coupe

A drift missile for the price of a smartphone? Hmm, sounds a little far-fetched, I know, but trust me on this.

When I first noticed drifting, it wasn’t through the channels of its Japanese origins; drifting made itself known in the form of Hulk Hogan’s son, Nick, and his dabbling with the pros in his yellow Supra – the one he eventually crashed and left his best friend paralysed with. After a stint in jail, Nick faded away from the scene and that was that, but for the few episodes I saw him drift, I couldn’t help but notice the seemingly large sums of cash needed to partake in the sport.

That was nearly a decade ago, and ever since that yellow and chrome monstrosity, I’ve been fascinated, studying the varying styles and cultures surrounding international drifting. The sport has made a such big impression since the States transformed the Japanese parking-lot precision driving into its FormulaDrift series, virtually every petrolhead on the planet has tried kicking out the rear of their car and holding a drift.

That’s what’s so great about the sport – with a little practice, anyone owning a relatively light RWD car with around 150+ bhp and 150+ ft-lbs of torque can drift it (on closed roads or track, of course).

This has led to the formation of drift clubs both big and small, drivers meeting up and getting their missiles sideways. Drifting has managed to knock down barriers and bring different car genres together, from German coupes to Japanese turbos to American muscle, all shredding rubber together on track.

Owning a drift missile doesn’t have to be costly either, as the title of this article suggests. For the price of a leading smartphone (£600-£999), you can pick up a solid, high-mile BMW E36 325i/323i/328i or a Mk1/2 Mazda MX-5. After ripping out the entire interior and installing a secondhand roll cage and bucket seat, you’re virtually ready for some handbrake/clutch kick action.

Although this article comes across as a poor man’s answer to drifting, it actually backs up the original Japanese theory that less is more. I wrote a piece for Motor Ward featuring the drift king himself, Keiichi Tsuchiyai, the grand master and inventor of drifting. He says drifting a car with limited power (anything under approximately 140-bhp) is far harder than sliding a more powerful car, thus throwing a cheap missile around means you’ll eventually develop uber drifting skills – it’s harder to kick out the rear of an old 130-bhp Toyota AE86 than it is  a 400-bhp Skyline.

HeLLga’s Loving Leather Embrace

If the interior is in decent condition, you could sell it and put the extra cash into a super chip or re-map for that extra 25-bhp. Give the car a full service, especially the engine and all of the fluids. Tape up the lights, fix a sports steering wheel and drift brake lever, finally spraying/wrapping your weapon matt black, and you are ready to shred.

Okay, so once you’re hooked and you get the hang of it you’ll ruin yourself spending out on power gains, superior suspension components, racing clutch kits and body panels, but how much more adrenaline do you expect to spill for the price of a phone?

iPhone or iDrift?

Easy…

 

 

 

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Wings, Box Flares & Lots Of Paint

Not only is the BMW pictured above a thing to behold, this 1976 3.0-L CSL boasts a splendid array of colours that somehow work and highlight the car’s features. Art purists will smirk at the idea of using a car as a canvas, but artist, Alexander Calder, known for surrealism, modern art, and his kinetic sculptures, represents his chosen genres well here.

The above image may not be to everyone’s taste, but take in the style and compare with the rather brilliant image below. I know which “canvas” I’d rather have presented/parked in my living room.

Calder isn’t the only artist to take inspiration from the Bavarian Motor Company. Everyone has heard of Andy Warhol, right? He’s the chap responsible for Pop Art – take in the piece below and you’ll immediately recognise the style.

So what does a modern (slightly mad) artist do when he takes hold of a 1979 BMW M1 and some brushes? Take a look below and marvel at the solid German engineering combined with the insanity of an artist let loose with his paint box.

The M1 was BMW’s supercar, a fact Warhol seemed to know when he went to work on it. What would look ghastly on a human, this mix of clashing colours just looks right on this boxy retro sports car.

I’m a big BMW fan and have owned a black E46 M3 and currently drive a black E36 325i coupe. I couldn’t do a Bimmer art post without including one of my favourite looking cars, the E30 M3. Not only is the E30 iconic, this collection of car art boasted a wonderful example of simplistic and solid German design painting by an artist known for his simplistic shapes and colours.

I’d never heard of Ken Done until I saw this collection featured on BMWism.com – click the link and check out the other BMWs and the varying styles lavished and embellished upon their boxy and retro bodies.

 

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CoPo Muscle Vs Evil Legend GNX

 

If you follow my blog, it’s fairly obvious which car wins it for Gargling Gas. The Buick GNX is my idea of heaven, both mentally, physically and even sexually.

Motor Trend  is a very good YouTube channel, the cars fantastic and the presenters knowledgeable and fair. I agreed the outcome was close on the two cars featured, especially as the 69 Chevelle was a CoPo boasting widow-making horsepower.

The match up was hardly old vs new, but the generation gap showed what a turbocharged V6 could produce. Don’t get me wrong, as I adore all muscle cars, it’s just the GNX was one of those bizarre releases from a company known for tame machines. If you lined up a bunch of muscle cars and suinted your eyes, the Chevelle wouldn’t stand out – the GNX, however, would be that streak of black, the Grim Reaper lurking in your peripheral vision.

Watch and enjoy the entertainment and great reviews.

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Whilst the title is a little ambiguous, it holds the key to the ultimate driving experience and will make sense once you watched the following video.

I fervently follow Jalopnik and their YouTube /DRIVE channel, knowing my automotive needs will be satiated with either interesting news or all-out mayhem.

It obviously comes down to personal taste in what you look for in a car’s chassis, but I have to go with the Toyota MR2 or the Mazda MX-5 (Miata) for slow(ish) cars you know you can throw around and experience that feeling of speed due to the car’s compact size and the minuscule gap between you and the tarmac.

Whilst both of these cars are RWD and excellent for kicking out the rear (the MR2 perhaps too easy due to its mid-mounted engine), you may prefer FWD or AWD, the ability to attack corners without the risk of spinning or ending up in a ditch more suited to your style.

Check out the video below and tell me your favourite slow car you know feels fast when it is either sideways or zipping along bendy country lanes.

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Dashboard Attraction

1982 Lancia Orca – Source

Whether its seamless lines or seductive curves, a car’s style and beauty is usually judged upon its body shape, its interior features taking a back seat, so to speak.

Since our true connection and enjoyment comes from being behind the wheel of a car, staring into an aesthetically appealing dashboard only heightens the experience.

 

1984 Aston Martin Lagonda

 

Because cars all possess different characters, manufactured to suit all walks of life, finding that comfortable and familiar interface isn’t hard. The pipe, slipper and open fire lover will prefer acres of polished walnut and chrome whilst the geek or technophobe will opt for the dash equivalent of the iPod.

 

1981 Citroen Xenia concept – Source

The dash I find most attractive would no doubt see me into a ditch from staring at it and not paying attention to the road. It comes from a car I know I’ll never own, an Italian rally-bred monster with muscular box flares and gorgeous lines. It’s turbocharged and four-wheel-drive, all its power and tech crammed inside a small car built by a company renowned for its terrible build quality.

Guessed it yet?

 

Lancia Delta HF Integrale Evo 

It’s that ultimate driver car and petrolhead’s fantasy, the Lancia Delta Integrale. Its looks and performance overpower any pragmatic cries of reliability, rust, and recovery vehicles. You’d drive one every now and again, each time a treat and as thrilling as the last.

Complimenting this design experimentation in sex and desire by feeding you information as you take control, comes a magnificent dashboard, one I simply adore. I think it’s down to my love of watches and dials and being able to see what’s going on under the bonnet.

 

 

Aesthetics is a highly subjective topic, but I think anyone can appreciate what is going on here.

So what’s your favourite dashboard? Are you a digital man or dial man?

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BMWs & Preparing Lithuanian Sledges

Owning a BMW E36 325i and possessing a passion for sideways action, it was only a matter of time before I’d stumble across the ‘The Ugly Duckling’, the incongruously placed BMW above. Its owner hails from a part of Europe boasting scented forests and pristine lakes, a seemingly serene and peaceful place… until you look a little closer.

There are some pretty cool goings-on taking place in Lithuania at the moment, a combination of old school BMWs, mad driving skills, and a creativity and enthusiasm captured in a series of short films.

Norbertas Daunoravičius (pictured above) is the brains behind Norbe Films, a vision shared through his website and YouTube channel. Here he reveals both his love of retro Bimmers and his ability to make them slide. Referring to what is commonly known as the ‘Drift Missile’, Norbertas prefers the name ‘Sledge’, a term coined from the current Lithuanian car culture. 

Norbe Films presents useful videos on Sledge preparation, primarily involving an old BMW and wrenching on it until it will drift. The film below is the longest – and perhaps considered his feature piece – The Ugly Duckling. Although the 15 minutes of footage features hardcore Hooning and antisocial driving, Norbetas manages to convey intelligence, humour and a real passion for cars. The Ugly Duckling also captures the spirit and culture of Lithuania, its people strong-willed, inventive and industrious.

If you haven’t got 15 minutes to spare, check out the excerpt above, a little taster, a lesson in Lithuanian parking.

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If you follow Gargling Gas or you’ve skipped through some posts, you’ll know I love the Buick GNX from the various posts on it. In fact, “love” doesn’t even come close; the Buick GNX to me represents everything I adore about the automobile, a car possessing an aura that IS the spirit of Gargling Gas.

The Darth Vader car is unique in the fact it managed to eat muscle cars whilst bearing the badge of blue rinse and comfortable slippers. The GNX is all black and very sinister, its owners probably best left alone. It was a murder car before the term “murdered-out” was coined.  In the late 80s and early 90s (and even today), a GNX pulling up next to your Corvette or BMW M3 at a stop light would be a daunting experience – its unnerving presence is also backed up by a performance that’ll frighten a E46 M3 and terrify a Porsche Boxster S.

Anyway, here is yet another post I wrote on the GNX, a guest post for WhyDoes.com  – Why Does Luxury Marque Buick Plan To Re-release Its Black Sheep?

More GNX reading:

A GNX Dragged Back From The Dead

Buick Please Don’t Taint A Legend

 

 

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